Applying punishment to teach children is
also an art.
Applying punishment to teach children is
also an art. If parents aren’t clever, they can have mistakes, and as a result,
it will be counterproductive. For example, in the situation that mothers
prepare for children to go to school, mothers say “Take dress and wear, otherwise
I will ask you to stay at home”, and babies will choose staying at home
immediately and mothers don’t completely want this thing.
Applying
punishment to teach children is also an art.
The following mistakes that parents can
easily catch when they give their children the discipline and solutions to
solve these things:
1. Not following children like a shadow
Do mothers know: If parents threaten babies
without acting, children will never take their parents’ advice? Once, Mary’s
mother took her to go to Daisy’s house. Daisy didn’t agree to let Mary paly
with her toys. Her mother said “You should lend Mary bear, if not, I will take
the bear”. Of course, when Mary played with another toy, Daisy also continued
not letting Mary to play.
Solution
If mothers really want to prevent babies to
do something, they should act and shouldn’t have idle talk. The reason is that
babies won’t pay attention the things that you say unless you stand up and ask
them to stop. First of all, mothers should warn them about result of things
that they do. If children continue doing these things, mothers can give babies
chance in the second time for reminding. If it isn’t effective in the second
time, mothers can apply punishment that they said.
If
mothers really want to prevent babies to do something, they should act and
shouldn’t have idle talk.
2. Telling lie to babies
Tom - 2 years old - is determined not to go
to school on Monday of every week. In that morning, his mother took him to go
to school, but he was determined not to get off car, he followed his mother and
cried. His mother pointed the house whose doors are closed and said “If you
don’t go to class, I will take you to that house and keep you in that dark
room”. And of course, although Tom was crying, he was obedient to follow his
mother to go to his class.
Solution
Telling lie to babies isn’t good and
sometimes, it will be counterproductive. Instead of this thing, you should put
yourselves in children’s mood because sometimes mothers don’t want to go to
work at all. In this case, it’s better to comfort babies.
3. Parents are too hot-tempered
In a family, father is often hard to
repress his emotion and he lacks patience to children. Sometimes, fathers often
apply punishments that make babies feel threated, even when babies know about
their mistakes.
Solution
In the case that fathers are strict,
mothers need to explain to help father understand: that thing won’t help babies’
behavior better and sometimes this thing also makes babies feel that their
fathers are unfamiliar and threatened. Being strict with children is a necessary
thing; however, you need to be calm and apply the different methods for
particular cases.
In
the case that fathers are strict, mothers need to explain to help father
understand problem.
4. Seducing to help babies eat with reward
Mother of Kate (2 years old) shared: Her
daughter suffers from anorexia. When mother wants her to eat rice, her mother
must seduce her by promising to let her eat chocolate or lollipop and after
that the baby will continue eating. As a habit, on meals, Kate harasses her mother
to give her this thing, that thing according to her hobby. Moreover, Kate likes
to eat fried dishes, so this thing makes her mother very worried.
Solution
Mothers shouldn’t create the habit of
requiring according to baby’s idea. Therefore, instead of soothing babies “If
you eat the whole rice, I will buy toys for you”, you should praise to
stimulate babies’ attempt “Kate is very obedient in eating. You are going to
become adult. I am very proud of you”. Or mothers can express disappointed
attitude when babies don’t follow your advice “I feel very sad about you”, and
as a result, children feel understand that they don’t behave well.
Instead
of soothing children, mothers should praise to stimulate children’s attempt.
5. Parents don’t behave correctly
Teacher is very surprised when Tom - 3
years old - push his friend’s hands and shout at with bad words because he
doesn’t want his friend touch his new pen case. In reality, this mistake isn’t
completely caused by Tom. Tom has that behavior because he imitates his
parents’ behavior when he tries to get near key or book on bookshelf. Children
can lean by imitation quickly and sometimes parents themselves unintentionally
teach babies with bad things.
Solution
Parents need to be careful in words as well
as behavior, even when babies have mistakes. Parents should be a standard
example to help babies follow.
Parents
need to be careful in words as well as behavior.
6. Losing patience to children
Taking care of active babies requires
patience. Any patience has its limitation and this thing makes mothers lose
self-control. As a result, mothers will scold babies.
Solution
Mothers need to be calm by let children
stay and you will move to another room. In the case that has mother and child,
mother needs to ensure about safeness for baby. You can ask someone to observe
babies. Changing air and having space for taking a rest, you can avoid
unfortunate behaviors. Children can make you feel extremely angry; however, it
quickly makes you smile again.
7. Letting babies wait in a long time
Mother of Anna drove and went to the school
to pick her up. At that time, there were a lot of vehicles on the roads, so all
vehicles must move slowly. While mother was anxious to move on the road and she
couldn’t escape form traffic jam, Anna removed seatbelt, was anxious and didn’t
sit at one place. Her mother soothed her:” You must tie seatbelt and sit at one
place. When we come back home, I will read fairy tale for you to listen before
you go to bed”. This is an effective method that mother often applied every
evening to remind her child to hide toys, change clothes and go to bed. After
that, Anna continued disrupt in car.
Solution
Babies that are 2-4 years old can forget
things that they have just made mistakes and are reminded by their mothers
after 1 hour. Therefore, mothers need to pay attention and remind babies
regularly and you need to let babies recognize result of bad behaviors as soon
as babies have just done, you shouldn’t wait until the next day.
Mothers
need to pay attention and remind babies regularly.
8. Saying too much to babies
A father likes to talk and explains his
daughter with many problems in life. To reminding her to go to bed early, he
also says: “You must go to bed early. You exercise all day. Evening is the time
when you should take a rest to have strength for tomorrow…”
Solution
Explaining children’s questions is a good
thing; however, parents need to pay attention that they shouldn’t say too wordy
because children aren’t adults that are reduced. Mothers only need to say:
“Children shouldn’t eat candies before eating rice” and you can ignore
explanation about sweet foods. This thing can make children not want to eat
rice.
