You are 20 Weeks and 3 Days 137 days to go…
Part of the fun of not knowing your baby’s sex is anticipating what it might be, but be prepared for others to do the same.
The eyelids are still fused shut to protect your baby’s
developing eyes from prying fingers and toes. Deep within the brain,
connections are starting to form to link the senses to those areas
within the brain that are able to process information.
Your baby today
If you and your partner decided
against finding out the sex of your baby at the 20-week scan, the
guessing games will begin and you won’t be short of people telling you
what they think you’re having.
Perhaps your own
instinct is the best of all: in one study that asked women to guess the
sex of their baby, 71 percent of the expectant moms surveyed guessed
Although you may prefer to have a child of a different gender, you might find that your children are delighted to be having another same-sex playmate.
It’s definitely a…
If you like testing a few old wives’ tales on gender, consider these:
Ask someone to tie a gold ring
on to a piece of string and dangle it over your belly to “dowse” for
the sex. If it swings from side to side or back and forth, it’s a boy;
if it spins around in a circular motion, you’re having a girl.
Hairier than usual? Apparently, according to the “old wives,” you’re more likely to be carrying a boy.
If your baby’s heart rate is faster than 140 beats per minute, you’re having a girl (but see You are 16 Weeks and 4 Days!).
Craving sugar, spice, and all things sweet: girl. Sour or salty foods: boy.
I’ve found out at the 20-week scan that I’m having my third
girl, but I so wanted a boy. How can I feel better about this?
It can be enormously disappointing to find out that your
baby’s sex is different than what you wanted, and perhaps even expected.
I felt that I’d let my husband down in some way, especially since I
knew he wanted a son.
The good news is that
by the time our daughter was born, we were both over the
disappointment, and were able to focus on being parents. We always said
that if we’d waited until the birth to find out, it would have been hard
to come to terms with it at the same time as trying to bond with our
Remember that you
haven’t met your new daughter yet, and it may be difficult to imagine
loving another daughter, but you will do, in time. Try to focus on the
fact that she is healthy and that you’re having a beautiful baby.
You are 20 Weeks and 4 Days 136 days to go…
There are few better ways to relieve those pregnancy aches and pains, and to wind down, than to have a soothing massage.
Shown here is a Doppler ultrasound scan. Your doctor may use a
handheld Doppler ultrasound machine to identify your baby’s heartbeat;
Doppler scanning can also pick up sudden movements and the whoosh of
blood through the placenta.
Your baby today
When you book a massage, make sure
you do so with a therapist who is experienced in prenatal massage.
Although it’s unlikely to occur at this stage, massaging the wrong areas
or certain acupressure points can trigger uterine contractions (this
can actually make a massage beneficial during labor when you want to
speed things up).
Before making an
appointment for a massage, check with your doctor that it’s okay to have
one. Massage may not be recommended if you’ve had complications such as
high blood pressure or diabetes.
Comfort is crucial and
most therapists will position you lying on your side with your head
supported by a pillow (see image). Don’t hesitate to tell the therapist
if you’re uncomfortable or if any aspect of the massage hurts. An
experienced therapist should check that you’re comfortable throughout
the massage and stop if you’re not.
If you don’t
want to book a professional massage, you can always call on your
partner or a willing friend. It is, however, important that the person
who is massaging you is careful and does not attempt to work on the
In addition to making a
world of difference to those aches and pains and helping you to relax, a
massage from your partner is a good way to be intimate with him at
times when you might not feel like having sex.
If you don’t feel up to having a full massage, a foot, hand, or head massage can be very soothing.
Having a professional massage
during pregnancy can be a real treat. Besides feeling blissful,
research shows that it eases aches and pains, helps you sleep, and can
I can’t look in the mirror because I’m feeling so down about my size. Will things get better?
You’re not alone in battling with your self-image in
pregnancy. For some women, their changing body shape can create negative
feelings. Eating a healthy diet and getting some exercise helps prevent
excessive weight gain, and exercising will also lift your spirits and
improve your sense of well-being.
There’s no set
emotional response to pregnancy, but in addition to coming to terms with
a momentous life and body change, you are also under the influence of
fluctuating hormones, all of which affects your mood and can add to
feelings of negativity.
Mild depression in
pregnancy is often helped by reassurance and support from your partner,
family, or friends. Talking over your fears and concerns may help
relieve your anxieties—you’ll probably find that other pregnant women
are experiencing the same feelings.
If you are feeling very low and desperate, don’t hesitate to consult your doctor.