Your role as go-between
One of the most important
roles of a birth partner, whether you are the baby's father or someone
else chosen to be the birth partner, is to be aware of what is happening
during the labor and birth and to liaise with the medical professionals
on behalf of the mother if necessary. There may be instances when you
or your laboring partner don't understand why a certain course of action
is being taken, and your partner may be in too much pain, or too
preoccupied with labor, to be able to ask. Your job is to talk to the
midwife or doctor and gather information about what is happening. This
means that you will both feel fully informed about what is happening in
labor and will be able to participate in any decisions that have to be
made about the labor or birth.
Keeping informed:
As well as
providing emotional and practical support, an important aspect of your
role is to pay attention to what is happening and ask questions on your
partner's behalf.
Extra birth partners —Can you have more than one birth partner?
Most hospitals
are happy for women to have more than one birth partner, although some
do set limits, depending on the amount of available space.
It's common for women to have their mom, sister, or close friend with them in addition to their partner.
If
labor is particularly long, having more than one birth partner can mean
that they can relieve each other for breaks knowing that the mother has
someone with her.
Some evidence suggests that having a female birth partner reduces the amount of pain relief and intervention needed.
Remaining calm —Keeping your cool under pressure!
Even though the
birth of your baby is one of the most memorable and exciting events of
your life, it can also be hard to witness your partner's pain and to
stay calm under pressure.
Being mentally
prepared to see your partner experience considerable pain can mean that
you are more likely to respond in a reassuring, rather than anxious,
way.
Breathing and relaxation techniques can help you stay calm and focused too.
If you do start to feel flustered, it may be wise to leave the room briefly, if there is an opportune moment, to refocus.
NOTE
Having a trusted birth partner—whether your husband, best friend, or mom—can help you labor more effectively
NOTE
Good communication and getting information from caregivers is key—we are less stressed when we feel involved in decisions
Birth partners Your support during labor
The goal of a birth
partner, whether this is your husband or life partner, a friend, family
member, or hired doula, is to offer practical and emotional support to
you throughout labor and birth.
| Q: |
How can birth partners help?
|
| A: |
Since a birth partner's role is to support you through labor and
birth, it is important that they are aware of your wishes and are
prepared to advocate on your behalf or keep track of events when you are
not able to. It is important that they are knowledgeable about the
stages of labor and have discussed with you in advance ways in which
they might help, whether through practical support such as massage or
helping you with labor positions, or by offering you encouragement and
reassurance.
|
| Q: |
What is a “doula”?
|
| A: |
Doula is a Greek word that means “woman servant” or “caregiver.”
Nowadays, this refers to someone who gives emotional and practical
support to a woman before, during, and after birth. The goal is for a
woman to have a positive experience of pregnancy, birth, and early
motherhood. This help and support is extended to the partner and other
children. Doulas can offer support in pregnancy, which gives time for
the family to get to know her. In labor and birth, she can help with
massage, suggesting different positions, interacting with professionals,
and giving emotional support. After birth, doulas can help with feeding
and baby care, as well as care of the mother. Some do housework,
prepare meals, and entertain older children.
|
Fathers can provide invaluable emotional and practical support to
their partners during labor. Being attentive to your partner's needs
and comforting and encouraging her will help her to deal with the labor.
Myths and misconceptions Is it true that…
| Q: |
You have to pant while giving birth?
|
| A: |
Some
natural childbirth practitioners advocate “patterned breathing” or
panting during childbirth, while others recommend natural deep
breathing, and techniques that rely on positioning and relaxation.
Patterned breathing or panting can be useful if it helps you manage
contractions, but it's best to just do what feels right for you.
|
| Q: |
Each labor gets easier?
|
| A: |
This may or may not be true for you. Generally speaking, second labors are shorter in duration, but that is not always the case.
Shorter does not always mean easier: your second baby could be bigger
than your first, or positioned differently; there are many factors that
affect your experience of giving birth.
|
| Q: |
You will feel the urge to push?
|
| A: |
Feeling the urge to push is instinctive, natural, and overwhelming, right? Well, believe it or not, this is not always true.
Many women do feel an urge to push, but sometimes pushing is painful
and women will avoid pushing at all costs. Other times medications, such
as an epidural, will interfere with the sensation of needing to push.
Your midwife will help you understand what's happening and guide you as
to when it's safe to push.
|
