Build Your Maternity Wardrobe
This week, you can
•
Go through your existing wardrobe to decide which of your clothes to
pack away, which you might be able to get more wear out of during your
pregnancy, and which you should keep close by for after the baby’s birth
• Make a list of clothing items you’ll need
during your pregnancy, and decide whether to borrow those items from a
friend or relative, raid your spouse’s closet, or buy your own
• Come up with a system for circulating clothes as they are outgrown
• Shop for items you’ll need in the coming weeks, with an eye to the future
• Make a plan for replenishing your maternity wardrobe as your pregnancy progresses
CONSIDER YOURSELF LUCKY! When Meagan was
pregnant with her first child in the late ’90s, there weren’t nearly as
many options in maternity wear as there are now. Stores usually carried
just a rack or two of maternity clothing. What was available was often
cheaply made and featured prints as infantile as a newborn’s layette,
complete with unflattering details like ruffles and bows in all the
wrong places. It was as though pregnant women were expected to dress
like babies themselves. Many tears were shed in department-store
dressing rooms during that first shopping excursion.
Things have certainly changed since then. From
high-end to discount, there’s a huge array of maternity clothing
available that’s stylish. Better still, some compassionate genius
finally realized that women don’t stay the same size throughout their
pregnancies. Now you can buy clothing specially made for the first,
second, or third trimester. You’ll also find a variety of fitting
options to choose from, from drawstring waists to elastic panels that
firmly hug a growing belly instead of falling down.
While choices are great, they can also complicate things a bit. Do you run out
and buy clothes for the entire pregnancy early on? Or wait and see how
big you get? Do you need a pair of pants with each type of waistband?
I recommend shopping for maternity clothes slowly
and deliberately. Yes, it can be tempting to run out and load up on
those adorable shirts. But every pregnant woman develops differently,
and carries her baby differently, too. Surely you’ve seen a pregnant
woman who looks as though she swallowed a basketball—no weight gain in
her rear or hips. If you’re less lucky, you’ll add extra “padding”
throughout your entire midsection. You’ll need to make decisions about
which styles are most flattering and comfortable based on which category
you fall into—and you probably can’t know that yet.
Also, a word of caution: Don’t leap into maternity
clothing too early in the pregnancy. Yes, many women start outgrowing
their jeans almost as soon as they see the pink lines on the pregnancy
test. And by now, several months in, you’re almost certainly bursting
out of some of your pre-pregnancy clothes. But while you may feel like
you look just huge, chances are good that your “baby bump” isn’t very
noticeable to others yet. At this point, maternity tops or jeans may
just hang on you and look sloppy—or worse, make that cute baby belly
look more like a case of bloat.
What to do while you’re waiting for your midsection to grow a little bigger? Some tricks to try:
•
Shirts with gathered sides. Whether you get them off the maternity rack
or from the regular department, gathered shirts hold nice and snug
against your figure early on, then expand with you. They make a great
postpartum top because they are forgiving without looking like muumuus.
• Crisp, tailored cotton tops. Don’t shy away
from fitted clothes early on in your pregnancy. A shirt with just a bit
of “give” will accommodate your growing form but still look pulled
together.
• Work with what you’ve got. With some
ingenuity, your existing pants can work for a few more weeks. Try
threading a rubber band through the buttonhole on your favorite jeans
and use it for stretchy closure. Or buy a Bella Band—a stretchy tube of
fabric you wear over your unbuttoned pants to hold them snug against
your body while giving you a smooth look under shirts.
• Raid your husband’s closet. If he’s not much
larger than you, you may find that his T-shirts or even his pants fit
for a while.
• Think yoga and dance. Companies like Gap Body,
Capezio, and Lululemon make yoga and dance wear that easily go from
studio to home, and, depending on your dress code, maybe even the
office. Plus you’ll get a lot of wear out of a well-made pair of yoga
pants in your early months of motherhood. Look for pants with firm
enough waistbands to support your growing body and smooth out lumps and
bumps.
PLANNING YOUR MATERNITY WARDROBE
I know you’re still dying to get to the fun
part—shopping—but we need to go through a few important steps first. You
just got done organizing your closet. The last thing you want to do is
stuff it full of clothes you won’t really need.
What I want you to do first is to think about your
unique clothing needs. Many pregnancy books will give you a checklist
of items to buy for your maternity wardrobe—for example, three pairs of
jeans, two skirts, two leggings, and so on. I’m not going to do that
because I don’t know how you dress on a regular basis. The point is that
your maternity wardrobe has to work for you. The only way for you to
know that it will is to look at what you actually wear and then try to
figure out wardrobe solutions for your new body.
Think back over your last typical week and write
down the items you wore each day. For example, maybe you work in a
professional office. This week you may have worn two skirts, two
button-down shirts, two blazers, two sweaters, two pairs of dress
slacks, one dress, one pair of leggings, two pairs of jeans, three
casual tops, and two sets of workout clothes. On the other hand, if you
work from home or in a casual office, your particular wardrobe may have
been much heavier on the jeans and casual tops. Either way, the best way
to get a feel for what your needs might be throughout the pregnancy is
to take a look at what you wear in your actual life.
A NOTE ABOUT BRAS
It’s likely that the first clothing purchase
you’ll need to make is a good, supportive bra. For many women, added
girth in this area is one of the first symptoms of pregnancy. And while
you’re gestating, your breasts may continue to grow.
A good bra that fits your new figure is a must,
but there’s nothing magical about maternity bras. If you already shop at
a lingerie store whose products or employees you trust, feel free to go
back there to get fitted for your pregnancy bras. Just make sure that
whatever bra you choose, it has a supportive cup and a wide, adjustable
strap that’s not too stretchy.
Some so-called maternity bras double as nursing
bras, but I think this is a potential waste of money. Your breasts may
grow again by as much as a cup size or two in the early days of
breastfeeding. Don’t spend a lot of money on maternity/ nursing bras now
expecting to use them later. You may have very different needs when
you’re actually breastfeeding.
The same goes for maternity underwear. Many women
find that they can wear the same bikini underwear throughout their
pregnancies. You might be tempted to buy a few packages of those “granny
panty” maternity briefs, but consider this: They have a nasty habit of
rolling down over your belly. This is very uncomfortable and not too
attractive either.
Now think about how often you do laundry or take
your clothes to the dry cleaner. Are you willing to attend to laundry
more often throughout your pregnancy so that you don’t have to buy as
many clothes? Or will you do the laundry with the same frequency—or even
less often? Also, how hard are you on your clothes? How many times do
you wear a garment before you toss it in the hamper or the dry cleaning
bag? Be realistic. With this information in mind, map out a list of what
you’ll need to get you through your pregnancy.
Using grid paper, regular notebook paper, or an
Excel spreadsheet, make a list of each item you’ll need down the
left-hand side of the paper. List each item separately (i.e., if you
need two pairs of jeans, write “jeans” twice). If you want specific
styles or colors of each (e.g., “black slacks” or “white button-down
shirt”), also note that in your list. Working in Excel will allow you to
easily update this list throughout your pregnancy as your size and
needs change. I’ve included a sample checklist for you to copy.
Now go through any clothing you may have already
purchased or that friends or family have lent you and figure out what
fits into which category. If you’ve got an item, mark an X to its right.
Again, be realistic. If your best friend loaned you a maternity sweater
and you hate it, it doesn’t count. You won’t wear it. If you are lucky
enough to find in your stack of loaner clothing a few “bonus” pieces
(e.g., a fancy dress you love even if you aren’t sure you’ll need it
yet, or three sweaters when you only need two), add them to the bottom
of your list. You want an accurate picture of what you have on hand, so
if a wedding or other special event comes up, you can tell at a glance
whether you’re ready.
| Clothing Item | On Hand |
|---|
| Jeans, boot cut | X |
| Jeans, skinny leg | X |
| White button-down shirt |
|
| Leggings, black | X |
| Cardigan, casual cotton |
|
| Cardigan, dressy cashmere | X |
| Work jacket, black |
|
When you’ve finished with this exercise, you’ll
have a pile of clothes that you know you’ll need and a list indicating
exactly what you still have left to purchase. You may also have some
items that have been loaned to you that you aren’t sure whether you’ll
need or not. Read on for some ideas to help you prevent a “donation
explosion” in your home!
GETTING A HANDLE ON HAND-ME-DOWNS
People love to give pregnant women unsolicited
stuff—especially advice, books, and clothes! Chances are good that the
minute you tell the world about your baby-to-be, friends start showing
up at your office or front door with bags and totes full of maternity
and baby clothes. Sharing clothing and baby gear is a wonderful way to
save money on things you’ll only use for a short time. But it can also
be a pain to keep track of, and one woman’s taste (or size) may not
match another’s. If you live in a small space and Susan is dying to
bring over a tote full of baby clothes, you may not know where you’ll
put them. And of course, if both Kelly and Jenny lend you maternity
clothes, it can become tricky keeping them all separate as you grow out
of certain items and into others. Here are a few simple guidelines to
help you keep track of donations.
Realize that most women hold onto their pregnancy outfits for sentimental reasons. Your
pregnancy, however, offers them a completely guilt-free way to clean
out their closets! Consider accepting only those clothing items that are
being given, rather than loaned. You won’t have to worry about rips,
tears, or stains. You can also donate the items as soon as you outgrow
them, or sooner if they’re not your style.
If you are part of a large circle of family and
friends who are planning multiple births over the next few years, you
may wish to keep these items rotating in your group. This is fine
provided you have the space to store everything while you wait for the
next birth announcement. Garage shelves are ideal for this. Divide the
items by trimester (or size, for baby clothes) and store them in clearly
labeled, heavy-duty plastic tubs. If you aren’t the one with the
garage, find the gal in your circle who does have the space!
If you do wish to accept items that are only on
loan, get permission to ID them. You can keep a written log, but this
can be easy to lose track of, especially if you aren’t feeling your best
throughout your pregnancy and/or are inundated by stuff. Instead,
assign a color to each friend or colleague who makes a donation. Placing
a slight color mark or initial on the inside sewn-in tag will remind
you who gave you the item. You can find a cheap ten-pack of fabric-safe
markers at fabric stores like Joanne’s.
If you simply don’t need or have space for items,
steel yourself for those well-meaning souls who want to foist their
castoffs on you. Don’t be afraid to gracefully say no!
SHOPPING FOR SUCCESS
Finally—you can go shopping! Armed with your
list, head to a few of your favorite stores and try some items on.
Maternity boutiques often have “pregnant belly” prostheses you can try
on under your clothing to get a sense of how an outfit will look as you
grow. This may or may not be all that accurate for you, but it will at
least give you an idea.
A few things to think about as you shop:
• Keep seasons in mind. If you live in an area with four seasons, your pregnancy will span at least three of them. If you’re going to buy clothes you won’t fit into for a while, be sure the seasons will work.
• Better yet, don’t buy ahead. In general, just
try to focus on the next few months of your pregnancy. As you grow out
of certain items, you can come back with an accurate idea of what you
still need.
• You’re still you. While it can be tempting to
splurge on romantic, fluttery dresses or hippie skirts while pregnant,
if you didn’t wear those styles before, you probably won’t wear them
now. Pregnancy doesn’t change your sense of style. If anything, you’ll
probably feel even more conspicuous in a fashion that isn’t “you” when
you’ve got a twentypound lump sticking out of your front.
• Look carefully at waistbands. You’ll see
simple drawstrings, two-inch firm elastic waists, belly panels that come
about halfway down to the crotch of the pants, and full-belly panels.
The drawstrings and two-inch elastic waists are great for early on, but
many women outgrow them fairly quickly. The half-belly panels often work
well into the third trimester and will probably be what you will wear
for the first couple weeks after your baby arrives. At this point of
your pregnancy (three months in), you’ll definitely want to avoid
full-belly panels. They’ll just let your stomach “pooch” out and look
baggy and lumpy. Only buy them later, if and when you need them.
• Store all your maternity clothes by the stage
of your pregnancy. Hang as many of the items in your closet as you can,
then keep them sorted on hangers by type (pants, tops, or jeans for
example). Use color as we discussed last week to help you find things in
a flash. But whether you’re putting these clothes in your dresser
drawers, closet shelves, or a storage tub or two, just be sure you keep
everything separate! If you have the bathing suit for your first
trimester in with the tops for your final weeks, it’s going to get
crazy-making.
As this week draws to a close, I’m going to bet
you are feeling a bit overwhelmed by the clothing issue. Remember the
Magic Formula? When in doubt, “eliminate, categorize, organize.”
“Eliminate” can mean something shouldn’t even
cross your threshold. Bring into your life only what you really need.
Resist impulse spending. A top may be adorable, but how many times are
you going to wear it? Continuously send back out into the world the
donated items you will no longer use.
Keep related items together. You will find that
categories make you feel powerful and in control. From soup to T-shirts
and screws to paper towels, you’ll be aware of exactly what you have in
every household category imaginable because you will then automatically
know exactly what you need. Think of the time, energy, and money you’ll
be saving. Practice keeping your categories organized. If you can
control your wardrobe, you can control the other large categories that
are about to descend on your life, from toys to books and beyond. In
organizing, the items change, but the principles stay the same.
Finally, if you share a
closet with your spouse, don’t forget to give some thought to how his
clothes will be arranged, too. He’s watching his partner grow and the
environment change right before his eyes; be sure he doesn’t feel
displaced. I worked with a woman once who had usurped every closet,
drawer, cupboard, and cabinet in the home as she grew great with child.
She felt she was all set and so was their soon-to-be-born baby. But her
husband felt like he was being squeezed out of the house. Don’t let that
happen in your home. Include your husband in everything from the start.
It will develop into a natural habit. The story of a marriage isn’t
told in the grand, sweeping events that mark its history. It’s created
in the day-today details like making sure he has enough space for his
clothes. You’re teammates after all in this great, once-in-a-lifetime
adventure.
