“I rise and shine”
Morning sex
is an especially good way to break out of your bedroom routine, and it’s a
pretty terrific wake-up call (not to knock an a.m. jog). It clears away tension
and shakes the cobwebs out of both of your bodies. And your guy’s penis is
actually wired for it: a lot of men like sex better bright and early because
they experience the so-called morning wood. Overnight, a full bladder
compresses the outflow of blood from the pelvic vessels, holding blood in the
penis longer than usual. The typical result is a morning erection. Be assured
that after a roll in the hay, you’ll both like what you see in the mirror –
you’ve set the right tone for a great day!
“Sex is my best medicine”
To help
ensure prostate health, encourage your guy to get regular doctor’s
examinations. Keeping fit will go a long way towards keeping things hot too.
Your guy’s arms, legs, back and abdomen are all involved in sex. If they become flabby, his penis risks becoming flabby. In
addition, the prostate, like all organs, benefits from exercise, and the best
workout it can get is getting off. When your guy ejaculates, his perineal
muscles contract violently, which provides a massage of sorts
for the prostate gland; that stimulation keeps its ducts open and prevents its
internal fluids from becoming stagnant.
Dr Dudley
Seth Danoff is the author of Penis Power: The Ultimate Guide To
Male Sexual Health
The Hard Truth
Despite how
localized an erection appears, it’s actually the result of a complex process
that involves the endocrine, muscular, vascular and neurological systems. The
penis gets stiff in a series of distinct steps. The first reaction, arousal,
occurs when the nerves are stimulated and microscopic blood vessels in the
organ begin to dilate. This can be triggered by something your guy sees, hears,
smells, feels or imagines. The link is so intimate and immediate,
it’s as if the penis has sense organ of its own.
When the
brain decides it’s time for the penis to rise to the occasion, it shoots
signals down to the lumbar area of the spinal cord. From there, the messages hightail it along a network of nerves to the penis. When
they arrive, the tiny muscles within the penile arteries relax and blood rushes
in at sex to eight times the normal rate. Your guy’s member then becomes
engorged – making it bigger, firmer and more erect. And when
everything’s in working order, the penis stays hard long enough to accomplish
its goal. That’s because a valve-like mechanism within his unit prevents
blood from flowing back out too soon. Once your guy ejaculates – or if his
arousal is interrupted for some other reason (see “When I’m nervous, you can
help”) – the penis quickly becomes flaccid again.
Q&A
Kiss
& Tell
Elna
Rudolph, sexual health practitioner
My
partner gave me oral sex all the time when we first got together but he hasn’t
for a while now. I’m embarrassed to ask him why. Could it be that he doesn’t
like how I taste?
We go
through phases in our sexual lives, and your partner is probably just stuck on
other things right now. Remind him of your favourite by doing him the favour
first. Make sure you’re fresh out of the shower (to ease your own anxieties),
then ensure you’re in the right position so he can return the favour. Or tell
him about a fantasy you’ve been having of him giving you oral. He’ll no doubt
be keen to fulfil this. If that doesn’t work, chat to him. And if it really is
about taste (which it rarely is), use a dental dam (available from sex shops).
Or place a sheet of cling film (yes, really) over your genitals with loads of
lube under it. It still gives a great sensation but is taste-free and has the
added benefit of protecting both of you from infections.
My
relationship is going well, but I constantly worry we’ll break up. Help!
The fear of
losing the person you love most is normal and rational. But constantly worrying
about a break-up in a relationship that’s going well isn’t. Are there other
things in your life that you’re overly anxious about as well? Do you worry
excessively about work or what other people think? If so, your concern might be
a symptom of a more generalized anxiety disorder. This can be treated and a few
sessions of psychotherapy might help you to understand where this fear comes
from and how to deal with it.
